How do you recognize someone who really cares about you?
When my wife and I first married we decided to prove we could live on love alone.
We had like almost nothing decorating our tiny apartment. Well, except a couple of weird plaster statues and an avocado green mixer and blender we got as wedding gifts. Hey, it was the 70’s! I worked as an intern pastor at a church for like nothing. My wife worked in a department store which we thought was big money.
But I remember our first Christmas. I went shopping, which is something I hate, and found her a beautiful cranberry glass candy dish. My wife loves china and crystal. Christmas morning she unwrapped it. She beamed, as she exclaimed, “I love it!” We had little but at that moment I felt like a millionaire. It still resides on our coffee table 45 years later.
About four years ago we were driving back from Car Week in Monterey. I’m a car addict and my wife goes along for the ride, literally. We own a 2011 Corvette and it was the 60th anniversary year. On the way, she said, “You know my dad owned a 59 or 60 Vette. I always loved that car. Do you think we might be able to find one?” I said, “Well, let me look.” I found a barn find 59, restored it and we enjoy driving “her” Vette occasionally.
See it’s not about the money you spend, great or little. It’s about gifting the other person with what they really enjoy. And that communicates love in so many ways.
People say a lot of things.They love you, they care for you, they’ll always be there for you, yada yada. But how do you really know who is glitter and who is gold? You watch their actions.
Is this person there for you when you need them? Do they allow you to go to bed sad? Do they let you deal with the pains of life alone? Do they treat you with respect?
Anyone who is consistently there for you—even when you royally piss them off or hurt them—cares for you.